Rant of the Week

I missed blogging yesterday... crap!
Today, I've just got one thing on my mind. Abraham Lincoln.

I've been reviewing all the @#$% about him in history.

He:

declared secession illegal

single-handedly increased the size of the federal army (Congress is supposed to do it)

nullified writ of habeas corpus

put newspapers out of business when they didn't agree with him

established supervised voting in Border States- you know, just in case

The army he led:
Burned homes, cities, crops, and killed livestock

Not only is this morally wrong, but it is plain outrageous as well.

1- Soldiers were fighting against their families- brother against brother

2- The South seceded, Lincoln had no governmental authority over them

So, not only did Southerners have to fight for the right to secede, they had to come home and realize that they were virtually penniless. Deprived of labor (okay, that's the one good thing that happened), capital, homes and the means of making a living.

I hate Lincoln. People love him because he was a "martyr for his cause", but really guys? He wasn't an abolitionist. His primary goal was to save the Union. That's why he wanted war.

I'm also sick of hearing bullcrap stuff about how presidents- like Obama and Lincoln- "inherited a national, political mess".

They asked for it!

Facebook? What's that?

After several seconds of deliberation, I have decided to make my Facebook page null and void. I get tired of watching people make their relationships "facebook official" and then refuse to tell who their blasted relationship is with. Why would a person make some knowledge public and refrain from bestowing related information? I get tired of watching people post innumerable amounts of pictures as if they are celebrities- Oh man, the excitement's getting to me now! I hope someone comments on my pictures! Gag me with a pitchfork.

It reminds me too much of being in high school. High school is gross. I can't wait for this chapter of my life to be over so that I can move on physically and not just mentally and emotionally. Drama is bad enough on the real world- I don't need to feel like I'm subjecting myself to the possibility of more of it every time I log on.

Anyways, life will be all-amazing and wonderful now.

Hopefully, I will have a little extra time to play games now. On my new computer.

Oh yeah, that's right. I got a new and awesome (used) laptop for only 75 bones, and am consequently awesome.... also it has pinball, and I'm getting addicted!

The Sun'll Come Out Tomorrow... Or Never

Yesterday, the sun didn't come out. Even though, in a semi- sort of way, it was a tomorrow. Because I had Drivers Ed, I was -to say the least- not very excited about driving in rain/ sleet/ snow/hail.
I momentarily thought about feigning the cut on my finger as a major or maybe fatal injury. About a half a second later, I knew that would be a total lame excuse.

So... long story short I went anyway and it was just fine.

Okay, but listen to this. Or read it. I wasn't going to blog about this, but it is too funny.
I automatically get in the back of the car so that my buddy-partner-pal can drive first.
So he was driving and we got to a turn and my teacher starts walking him through it.

"Turn right at this intersection.''
We get there.
"Now brake a little on your approach, and again when you are turning."
He does it perfectly, most of the time. I won't discuss how much this angers me.
But then! Then....
"You forgot your blinker. Make sure you use your blinker on the next turn."

I smile softly to myself.
He made a mistake.
And I was the Self- Proclaimed Master of the Blinker.

I also parallel- parked behind a lady who did it so awfully that you could totally tell she did not have a Drivers Ed instructor with her.

I also went to Arby's because I was famished and their food is beyond delicious. And the dumb people made fun of me.
I gave them my money and they laughed at me.
There are 2 life lessons to be learned in this:
Never give someone your money after they laugh at you.
Never laugh at someone after they give you money or pay your sad salary. They could chuck their medium root beer right back in your face. (Not that I did that, I'm just saying...)

Anyways, they kept laughing at me. It upset me.

Let's play a round of Who Should Be Pitied?

Someone in a Drivers Ed car? (Everyone has to take Drivers Ed. Unless you are Superman. Then you are just a moving violation.)

Someone who works at Arby's? (Not everyone has to work at Arby's. It's a choice.)

Since the government forces me and everyone else to take Drivers Ed, and those people chose of their own free will to work at Arby's and working at Arby's is nerdy (because it is in the fast food category)...


Then I think that they should shut their mouths. And pity themselves. Because I will never work at Arby's. And they do.

But I did not laugh at them, because I am a good person (and they still had my food, meaning they still could spit in it). I, clearly, have more reason to laugh at them than they have to laugh at me, but I did not.

Rant of the Week

So, listen...

Yesterday at church I was sitting in Sunday School, waiting. Our teacher usually waits for the boys who have to spend some time after Sacrament meeting putting the Sacrament stuff away.

So we were just talking and this girl - we'll call her LaFawnduh- asks me if I am able to sleep in. I told her no, and I was adamantly expressing my extreme disgust at the whole idea of sleeping in. Another girl- we'll call her La-a- was agreeing with me, and we were discussing the cons of sleeping in (grogginess, that icky taste in your mouth...)

Then there is a pause in the conversation and a girl -we'll call her Shania- looks up at us and says, "Some people are crazy."

Yeah. People who get off their butts and do something with their lives are crazy.

People who take advantage of the time during the day and get stuff done, who don't spend life dreaming away in their beds are crazy.

People who don't idle the days away are crazy.

Manliness Sold Separately

In Small Towns such as mine, people usually go to the Grocery Store on Friday nights. To conform with the usual practices, to seem somewhat normal, and to satisfy my appetite for Chocolate Covered Cinnamon Bears, my Dad and I went to the Grocery Store.

Much to my eternal disgust, there was a "boy" there working who was wearing skinny jeans.

Gag me with a fork. Skinny jeans are bad enough on girls, but when "boys" wear them I feel like re- visiting my lunch in the form of puking.

Driver's Permit

I won't mention the extreme amounts of RED TAPE that I had to work around this afternoon in order to get my Permit...
But, oh, the horror! The picture they took of me was awful!
I probably shouldn't have squeezed my mouth really hard and made the blood vessels in my neck almost burst, but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Banden Banshee by smiling at him.


(Name that movie!)

Letter/ Rant o' the Week

Dear Idaho State Government:
I just thought that I would write you a letter thanking you for the wonderful service that has been given me by the Idaho State Government. I am so grateful for the mandatory Health class that I get(oh whoops, I mean "am forced") to take in order to graduate from High School.
High School is hard enough without having to spend time learning about things that will actually benefit my future life. I am so glad that the government thinks that extreme amounts of time to waste reading textbooks that tell me that if I do things that are illegal I could go to jail, or that dangerous things can kill me.
Since I would not have figured this out on my own, I am also brimming with joy over the fact that the state is aware that all teenagers are brainless and has done something about it.

Obviously, telling someone about something that should be common sense is part of your job, you know, as a government official. Keep it up. I am glad that I don't have to think for myself. It is much easier to have the government to do it for me.

Sincerely,
Me (aka brainless dummy)

Rant o' the Week

The day when there are "Anti- Ketchup Packet" fan sites and groups on Facebook is a sad day indeed. (See this article here.) When I read this article on Yahoo, I realized that now is the time to REALLY say something about it.
I am surprised at the amount of time people have to come up with (and join!) these pages on the Internet. Not only do they clutter my Home Page on Facebook with unnecessary muck, but what do they accomplish?
Here are the reasons that teenagers join these groups.
1) They want their friends to think they are cool, too, by joining the same groups that they do.
2) They have disgusting amounts of time on their hands to spend re-clicking and clicking the mouse over and over and over again. "Become a fan" "Become a fan" "BECOME A FAN"
3) The need for psychological help is growing at an unprecedented rate, therefore teens feel that they have to join groups and show on their profiles that they, too, think that boyfriends shouldn't treat their girlfriends like crap (You can find that real, actual, absolutely non-artificial page on Facebook as well.. much to the chagrin of anyone who has common sense.) or other such nonsense.
Teenagers obviously feel that in order to fully express themselves, they need to join a bunch of groups on Facebook before the world ends so that their friends can know things they did a long time ago, or yesterday.

Examples: "Oh right, you were waving at the person behind me. My bad."
"No, they can't come over, this house is a mess!" "Mom, They Don't Care..."
"I was looking at you, but quickly looked away once you noticed."


The only thing that goes through my mind when I see such things is, "Really?" Has society really come to an era of expressing ourselves through groups that we join on Facebook? What about highly intellectual conversation? Will you find these on Facebook? Probably not. Because all girls want to do is talk about how bad their relationship is with their boyfriend and how the world will blow up in bits because he dumped them (my guess is that there are a bunch of lonely, lifeless girls who have joined that group).
BOO HOO!

Teenagers- Get a life! Get a hobby (Facebook is NOT a hobby!) or a job.
Or spend some time on Blogger, ranting. Just like me.

P.S. I think I will post an Official List of Hobbies and UN- Hobbies... you know, for the good of the world. Tomorrow.